Perhaps the suspect was a proponent of the Capitol Hill Currency project

The kids working behind the glass at Capitol Hill’s Dick’s Drive-In are renowned for being able to calculate what five Deluxes, three chocolate shakes, two pops and six fries rings up to off the top of their heads. Turns out, they’re also pretty good at spotting phony money — especially a counterfeit job so bad, the funky $20 bill a suspect tried to pass last week at the Broadway fast food joint that was missing design elements and was printed on regular office paper.

According to police, an eagle-eyed Dick’s cashier spotted the counterfeit money after a transaction late last Wednesday night just before 11 PM. The cashier told the man trying to use the bill that the police were being called and he left the area — without a burger. Police arrived to check out the phony 20 and to search for the suspect described as a Native American male with a black beard and wearing a “trapper” hat and a dark jacket.

“I could see that the watermark was partially missing, the paper felt wrong, and it did not have a security stripe,” the responding officer wrote in his report on the May 26th incident.

Police found the man nearby and he was identified by employees as the person who had tried to pass the bill. The suspect claimed he didn’t know the bill was fake and said it was given to him by a man he could identify only as “Longhair Touchesthesky.”

The 46-year-old arrested has not yet been charged but a judge found probable cause to hold him for the crime. The case has been referred to Federal investigators.

Meanwhile, we’ve found other counterfeit-related investigations in the 100-block of Broadway E in SPD’s records — we wrongly had assumed those must be related to the bank in the area. Turns out, you don’t want to try to sneak a fake bill by the sharp kids at Dick’s.

Sex offender busted at Cal Anderson
SPD says it arrested a man for indecent exposure in Cal Anderson on Sunday:

When officers rode up to the man near the park’s fountain, they found him sitting on a bench , holding a pornographic magazine right in front of his face, and one arm tucked inside his oversized t-shirt.

When officers questioned the man about what he was doing, he admitted that officers had literally caught him with his pants down.

Officers then arrested the man—who, they discovered, is also a registered sex offender—and found he was carrying several other pornographic magazines, a half-empty container of lubricant and had a sex toy in his backpack.

Officers contacted the Department of Corrections about the man’s arrest and booked him into the King County Jail for indecent exposure.

While violent assaults around the park have pushed City Hall and SPD to act to curb the criminal activity, there have been no updates on the investigation of this early May sex assault reported in the park. Police told CHS there were no updates on the case when we last inquired last week.